Day 5, Thinking about my Purpose
Point to ponder: Life is a test and a trust.
Verse to remember: “Unless you are faithful in small matter, you won’t be faithful in large ones.” Luke 16:10
Question to Consider: What has happened to me recently that I now realize was a test from God? What are the greatest matters God has entrusted to me?
Maybe it’s because I’m a pessimist, but I think I view most every situation as a test, though maybe while I’m not going through it. As a mom, my greatest test is how I behave when Liam’s not behaving. I’ve asked God for patience many times, forgetting that God doesn’t give us patience, but gives us opportunities to be patient. God gives me a lot of opportunities to be patient…
When Liam’s having a meltdown, I can choose to let his tantrum and his abundance of “NO!”s drive me to the edge, or I can choose to remain calm and rational. That doesn’t mean I don’t punish or don’t spank, but it means that I try to see Liam’s side of the situation and don’t react like I’m angry. Wednesday night is a good example, I that he didn’t obey me, enough so that not only did he get spanked, but when he still wouldn’t change his choices (and he did get choices), he ended up with an earlier bed time than normal. While I was trying to get him ready for bed, and he was kicking and punching me, he still got spanked for his actions, but he was told why he was being punished and I was able to remain mostly calm. And he was able to calm down and turn back into the cheerful little imp we love so much.
Sometimes I fail royally with him though, and I know it as it’s happening.
The greatest matters God has entrusted to me are my family and my finances. I’m not the best financial steward, but I’m becoming more aware of my choices, and that awareness had helped me make better choices in some situations. And of course, my family is the greatest matter of all. As far as Jeff is concerned, I haven’t been the best wife, but I have stood by him faithfully through every trial he’s gone through. How I react to those trials has gotten better over the years too. I’m not sure why God gave us an autistic son, but I know I wouldn’t trade Liam for the whole world. The absolute joy he has brought us is more astounding that I ever thought would happen, and though I fail as a mom many times, I just want to be the best mom I can and teach him about Jesus.